To resolve or not to resolve, that is the question

Ahh, resolutions. Those pesky promises we make to ourselves at the start of a new year- to lose weight, to spend less, to call home a little more often. You know the drill and you also know that by March, your new treadmill is serving more as a laundry rack and your attempts to budget are on hold until the Christmas bills are paid.

So why do we make resolutions in the first place?

The answer to that became very clear to me today. We resolve to do better, to be better, because even if we fail, we're still a little better than we were before. And a little better is still better, right?

If I resolve to save $1000 but I only manage to bank $500, I'm still 500 better off than I was before. If I resolve to lose 10 pound but I only lose 5, I'm still a little more healthy and a little more happy than I was before. I guess it all boils down to this: whether you move a step, a jump, or a leap, you're still moving toward something better.

I think a large part of keeping resolutions is accountability and tracking. That's where you come in! I'm hoping that if I publish my resolutions here and talk about them from time to time, I'll be more likely to keep them. So, here they are... my 2013 resolutions.

I resolve to do a random act of kindness each day. Yesterday, I left coupons on products at Wal-Mart. (There's nothing wrong with a little head start, right?) Today,  I rented the movie Robert wanted instead of the chick flick I wanted. I'm not sure if that really counts as a RAK but given that his movie picking privileges were revoked after the last movie he chose, I think it should.

I resolve to save more money. I'm sure I need a concrete value on this one but I haven't gotten that quite figured out yet.

I resolve to move more and eat less junk. Since Robert got home, I've put on a few pounds and it's time to get the jiggle out of my middle. I can't say I'll work out every day or that I'll get back on the P90X or Insanity bandwagons but I'm going to do something, even if it's just chasing Chet around in the yard. And eat less junk? Yeah, we'll see how well the posterchild for 'I love cold pizza and brownies for breakfast' does with that one! :)

Again this year, I resolve to try new things. I am such a creature of habit- I park on the same row every time I go to the store, I order the same thing when I eat out, I wear the same outfits every week. I am starting to think maybe I'm boring! I resolve to branch out, spend a little more time outside the box, and to see what I'm missing.

And finally, I resolve to think a little longer before I respond, to be a little more open-minded, and to be a little more patient. I am usually running around in a hurry, trying to multi-task and do too many things at once. I tend to want everyone to move at the same speed of blur that I do. I think it's high time that I stop to smell the roses and that I let everyone else enjoy them too. 

I hope you'll make some resolutions and that they will propel you toward a little better version of the wonderful you that you already are. I hope your 2013 will be something amazing, something memorable... something MORE. See you in the new year! :)

Looking Back on 2012

In just a few days, the clock will strike midnight, the ball will drop, people will kiss, and the fireworks (and shotgun rounds, if you live in the sticks like we do) will ring out as people all around the world ring in the new year.

In no time at all, 2012 will be just a memory but before I place it permanently in my rear view, I think I'll take a quick stroll down memory lane. Walk with me, won't you?

Since Robert was deployed last New Year's, I got to ring in 2012 in two different time zones. That might sound exotic and romantic but I can pretty much guarantee you that watching this year's ball fall from the same couch will be better by far. In March, he came home for a much-needed R&R. It's still up for debate who needed the R&R more!

July took us from a couple to a family with the addition of our fur baby, Chet, a sweet (and very rambunctious) chocolate lab. I was on my own for the first few weeks, potty training him and teaching him NOT to get on the furniture. His 67 pound body now regularly occupies a spot on Robert's favorite chair and at the foot of our bed.

September 9 was without a doubt the best day of 2012! After 353 very long days (and nights!), a huge plane landed on the flight line and a sea of camouflaged bodies streamed out. After a brief speech that no one heard, we navigated the maze of reuniting families to find each other. Next to the moment we said "I do" and "I do too", seeing hime home safe and sound was the happiest moment of my entire life.

October brought a two-week staycation which allowed us to reconnect and rekindle. The old adage proved true, time does fly when you're having fun!

Thanksgiving and Christmas 2012 were fantastic, full of family, fellowship, and food! (Lots of food; I'm pretty sure there will be diets in 2013!) and now, we're 48ish tiny hours from the start of a brand new year!

I hope your wishes came true in 2012; I hope that your dreams will be fulfilled in 2013. I know that wherever our 2013 takes us, we'll enjoy the journey because this year, we'll be able to take the journey TOGETHER. If there's one thing that 2012 taught me, it's that EVERYTHING is better when you're side by side with your best friend.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Staycation, Day 12: Special Forces, special indeed

Staycation is flying by! I can’t believe it’s almost over but if this is what retirement is like (a million years from now), sign me up!

Day 12 found us in Fayetteville so we decided to spend our afternoon at the Special Forces Museum. It was well worth the drive down and I highly recommend it (and it’s free, so that’s good too!)

I’ve spent the last few days trying to find the words to describe this museum that’s dedicated to those elite special groups who make it their life’s work to willingly put themselves in harm’s way to protect the lives and liberties of people they’ve never met. It’s fascinating to read about the missions, but more so, it’s humbling to read actual quotes from the people who completed them. My appreciation for our military is never far from my thoughts but this museum renewed my gratitude and left me searching yet again for how to say Thank You for all they do.

My loss for words was never more profound than when I stepped into the POW exhibit at the museum. I can’t imagine what those soldiers endured, what some may still be enduring today, and what their families must be enduring as they trudge along day after day not knowing the fate of their loved one. As I stood there, in awe of the determination and fortitude displayed by generations of our men and women in uniform, it occurred to me that any soldier, anywhere in the world, may be one breath away from becoming a POW. Truth be told, that sobering thought scared me more than most of the terrifying thoughts I had while Robert was away.

I hope today you’ll take a moment to thank a soldier or pray for one who isn’t home yet. And, the next time you find yourself near Fayetteville, I encourage you to stop by the museum. You’ll be glad you did. Until next time, friends, I hope your day is something historic, something life-changing (in a good way), something MORE.

Staycation, Day 11: On a Stick...

I’ve looked forward to this day of staycation since, well, since last October when we were not far enough into the deployment to even think about a staycation.

Last October, I decided that since Robert couldn’t go the fair, I’d take the fair to him. I carefully packaged up the most portable fair foods I could think of, cotton candy and candy apples, and crossed my fingers that they’d make it across the world without too much damage.

A few weeks later, I received what was perhaps the saddest letter I’ve ever read. Robert’s bright, shiny, red candy apple had fallen off the stick and had landed in the dirt.  As I read his heartbreaking account of accepting that his dirt-covered treasure couldn’t be recovered, I could almost see him staring at it, wheels turning, trying to figure out a way to salvage even a morsel of the cherry-flavored goodness. It was devastating; there may have been tears (mine, not his!).

I knew that we’d have to find a way to remedy his candy apple upset… and we did.

Thursday, we headed toward the State Fair for a new candy apple. Along the way, we also had cheese steak, a ham biscuit, honey cotton candy, and some deep fried Oreos. I love to say that the Fair is all about “fried things on sticks” but truth be told, other than the candy apple (that we brought home to eat later), we actually didn’t eat anything on a stick.

Day 11 of the staycation was fantastic and there’s still one more adventure to be had… I know you can’t wait until tomorrow. Until then, I hope your day was as rich as a deep fried Oreo, as sweet as cotton candy, and as simple as a candy apple… one that stays on the stick J. 

Staycation Days 7-9: Westward Bound

Since day 5 of our staycation took us eastward, it was only fitting that days 7 through 9 should take us west.

After dropping Chet off to spend a few days with my parents, we hopped in the car and headed to Asheville to spend a little time at Biltmore Estate.

Despite temperatures lower than I find pleasurable (read- it was COLD!), we had a great time! We toured the “house” even though calling it a house does it a huge disservice. Did you know that there are 43 bathrooms inside the Biltmore Estate? I mean INSIDE the house, for the family’s use, not the ones that were added outside the house for the public!

I apologize that there are no indoor photos for you to enjoy; there are rules and enough security cameras that breaking the rules wasn’t an option J.

After touring the immaculate and massive mansion, we wandered the gardens, and took a tour of the winery. We had a quick lunch at Cedric’s (which, by the way, is named for one of the Vanderbilt family dogs and has fantastic cheeseburgers), we toured one more exhibit where we saw Mrs. Vanderbilt’s Harley and learned that the Vanderbilts were originally scheduled to be passengers on the Titanic but changed their tickets at the last minute to travel with some friends who were traveling on the Olympic. Given that we just visited that exhibit in Raleigh, we found that interesting.

From the Biltmore, we took a very curvy road (and I do mean VERY!) to Chimney Rock State Park where we hopped on the elevator and flew up 26 stories to the top. We spent some time enjoying the scenic overlook.

We had a great time in Asheville; if you haven’t been to Biltmore Estate, you owe it to yourself to make the easy drive west on Hwy 40. The tickets are a little pricey but the house, gardens, winery, and parking are included with your purchase.

Our staycation isn’t over yet! We have at least 2 more adventures planned so stay tuned for what’s next... until then, I hope your week has been something majestic, something magnanimous, something MORE.

Staycation, Day 6: An A-MAZE-ING Day

A corn maze has been on my bucket list for as long as I’ve had the list but there was never anyone I wanted to get lost among the stalks with until now. Last fall season, Robert was away so I knew it would have to wait. Staycation day 6 seemed like a perfect fall day to mark the maze off the list.

Under a bright blue Carolina sky, we headed out to Ken’s Krazy Corn Maze in Garner. The primary objective of the corn maze is to find the 12 stations which are hidden among the twists and turns. Sounds simple, right? Yeah, it might be, if you had a map. But oh, yeah, they don’t give you that. You’re armed only with your keen sense of direction, your formidable powers of navigation, and a flag to wave if you find yourself hopelessly lost or just hopeless.

The good news is that we did not wave our flag. We also did not find all 12 stations.

It started out simple, until we took the first right turn. From there, we went down rabbit trails. We hit dead ends. We declared ourselves lost. We declared ourselves un-lost. We went in circles. We backed up and started again. We laughed. We went in more circles. We backtracked again. We laughed some more. And occasionally, we found a station and we cheered like we’d hit some sort of Mother Lode.

But as it is the journey and not the destination that matters, we had a great time laughing and getting lost and doing it together. And isn’t that what this staycation has been about all along?

Staycation, Day 5: What's for Lunch?

Perhaps the best part of a staycation is that there is absolutely nothing stopping you when someone says (at 9a.m.) “let’s have lunch… at the beach.”

We hopped on the bike and took a back road down to Wilmington where we enjoyed shrimp burgers and lemon pepper fries by the water.

Then we drove a little farther to the ocean and put our toes in the sand just long enough to take a fun photo (forgive the helmet hair; I haven’t quite mastered that yet!).

Heading home, we just enjoyed the scenic route of the open road.

Since Robert got home, I have been waiting for the moment that would finally, officially reset my internal compass from the off-kilter, perpetually anxious mindset that accompanies having a deployed husband to the steady, as-relaxed-as-any-military-wife-can-be mindset of “normal”, non-deployed life. Other military wives told me it would happen in time but in all honesty, I was starting to think that moment was lost on me. I’m thrilled to report that somewhere between the ocean and home, with the wind in my hair, the sun on my face, and my arms wrapped around my most favorite person in the entire world, I heard the distinct click of the direction arrows line up to relocate my true North. It was a beautiful sound, not one even the distinct rumble of a Harley engine could drown out. J

Staycation, Day 1 & 2: Walking Through History

On the heels of the 352 day deployment (not that I was counting days or anything!), Robert gets block leave, a chunk of vacation that’s supposed to give him time to catch up with family and work on that honey-do list that grew around the house while he was away.

Lucky for me, I have bosses that understand that even though I didn’t deploy, I needed the block leave too.  

We’d kicked around going somewhere tropical but the last thing Robert wanted was to get on yet another plane (can’t say I blame him there!) so we decided a staycation would be perfect. We’d stay home, go on a few little adventures, and just use the time to catch up. Our two weeks of fun began yesterday, at 4 a.m. because we have a puppy who doesn’t understand “sleeping in”. I suppose he was just helping us to make good use of our time. J

I needed new tires on the car and an oil change so we hopped in the car and took Chet on a visit to my parents’ house, out in the country where he could romp and play. Robert hadn’t seen my grandparents since our wedding so we swung by their house too; Gus  and Robert took a walk down history lane in my grandfather’s tobacco museum. As much as Gus loves telling those stories, Robert loved hearing them; it was like watching two kids in a candy store and a great way to start our staycation.

This morning we continued our walk down history lane with a trip to the Titanic exhibit at the Museum of Natural Science in downtown Raleigh. As soon as we stepped out of the car, the bottom fell out and by the time we got to the museum door, we were drenched! We laughed and decided that maybe it was fitting that we were soaking wet while we learned about the ill-fated “unsinkable” ship.

If you’re even the slightest bit interested in the RMS Titanic or history in general, this exhibit is a must see! Each ‘passenger’ is given a boarding pass that details an actual passenger on the ship. I was a second class passenger who was transferred to the Titanic after a coal strike caused my original voyage to be cancelled (wouldn’t that be just my luck!?!). Robert was a wealthy landowner who had actually medaled in fencing in the 1908 Olympics. At the end of the exhibit, we were pleased to learn that we were both listed in the survivors of that tragic night. I’ve always found the mysteries of the Titanic’s demise interesting, but having the personal details of actual passengers made it that much more so.

I’d say our staycation is off to a great start… stay tuned for what adventure we have in store for tomorrow. In the meantime, I hope your week has been something you’ll want to look back on when you’re walking down history lane. I hope it was something epic, something remarkable, something MORE.

Weekend Top 10

Without a doubt, some of my favorite blog posts are the Weekend Top 10 features. They are ways to quickly recap all of our adventures and when we look back on them months later, it feels like a speed skating roll down memory lane.

So, here we go… this weekend’s Top 10.

10- After a year’s hiatus, the grill finally made a comeback. Steak… it’s how Friday night should be.

9- When your puppy doesn’t understand that Saturday means sleeping in, you can get a lot done before the sun comes up.

8- Although working out at 5am isn’t fun, at least you get it over with early.

7- “This is the best lasagna I’ve ever eaten” is a pretty fantastic compliment. Feeling like Betty Crocker sure puts a girl in a good mood.

6- Did you know that college football hash marks are wider than NFL hash marks? If you’re ever on Jeopardy, you can thank me. J

5- After eating a week old brownie, I have a new appreciation for Robert always telling me they were still good when they got to the other side of the world. When your motto is “when you don’t know what to do, throw a brownie at it”, a little white lie is what a girl needs to hear to make her believe all’s quiet on the western front.

4- When you leave the puppy out in the house while you go to church, be prepared that he’ll probably “read” the paper and “thumb through” the coupons… all over the house… by the time you get home. (It’s a good darn thing he’s cute!)

3- Staying up until midnight is worth it when it means two weeks of vacation starts at 12:01.

2- Half a fence is better than no fence… and by this time tomorrow, a whole fence will make for two very happy puppy parents.

And the number 1 best part of the weekend was…

1-  that this place is once again filled with the sounds of football, the smell of fresh brewed coffee, and the love that makes a house a home.

And then there were three

Off and on for the last several months, Robert and I have been talking about expanding our family. And by expanding, I don’t mean my waistline. I’m talking about a four legged, floppy eared, wiggly tailed, bundle of fluff. Robert’s wanted a puppy for as long as I’ve known him but the deployment put those plans on hold. Or so I thought.

In April of this year, I got an email that Robert had found the perfect puppy. What?? You’re not coming home until September! I can’t raise a puppy from now until September by myself! Yep, that’s me- Little Miss Panic Attack.

The good news was that the world’s most perfect puppy hadn’t been born yet so I had time to research food, register for puppy class, puppy proof the house, and generally wrap my head around the idea of being a puppy parent. Isn’t it funny how quickly Little Miss Panic Attack can turn into Little Miss Masterplanner?

With the puppy plans settled, all we had left to decide on was the name. Robert chose the first name- Chet- and I convinced him to let me choose the middle. As a joke, I told him it should be Ercheze so that his full name would sound like Cheddar Cheese. Robert didn’t find that too funny but somehow it stuck and more days than not, our baby is referred to as “Chetter” or “The Cheese”.

Chet came to our home in July and despite a few growing pains and one chewed up cell phone charger, it’s been a fun couple of months.

I'm sure The Cheese will make regular appearances here; after all, he's a member of the family... our family of three.





The Boys of Fall

If you’ve known me for at least two minutes, you know that I love, love, love football. Well, I take that back. If you knew me in high school, you know I performed with the drill team for every football game but that I couldn’t tell a hash mark from a Hail Mary. We went to socialize, not watch the game, and I couldn’t even tell you the final score by the time I got home. But somewhere between high school and now, I actually started learning what was happening on the field and I fell in love with the game. I’m not an expert by any means but I know enough these days not to ask stupid questions when I’m in mixed company. I actually even impress myself sometimes (but not very often!)

I’m a supremely lucky gal because Robert loves football as much as I do. He’s a lot more vocal about it, mind you, but if there’s a game on, we’re pretty happy campers. If I could only get him to pull for my teams… but I know that’s a lost cause; he remarked Sunday that “there’s nothing like loyalty” so I guess we’ll just agree to disagree.

But the one thing we do agree on is that there’s not anything much better than a game on a perfect fall afternoon so we headed out on Saturday to watch the Carolina Tarheels host the Pirates from East Carolina University.

We couldn’t have asked for a better day. The weather was picture perfect- not a cloud in the sky but a moderate 75ish with a slight breeze. The seats were fantastic- 50 yard line, of course! The company was amazing as always; there’s nothing that isn’t fun when Robert’s around.

Carolina won but I guess some things never change; it occurs to me right now that after spending an entire afternoon actually watching the game, I still can’t tell you the final score. J

Sometimes Behind is Right in Front

When I decided to start this blog again, I said I'd put the deployment behind us and was ready to move full steam ahead toward the future. As it turns out, I was, as we like to say at our house, "less than right".

Yesterday, after Robert received a standing ovation from the congregation at church welcoming him home, I looked at the bulletin and noticed it was September 23. September 23? Last September 23, I was dropping him off to get on that plane bound for lands I never want to think about. I remember the foggy drive down to the base, the tearful goodbye, the miserable ride home, and the endless string of sleepless nights that followed. As I sat there, it dawned on me that deployment is not something you put behind you; it's one of those things that you carry with you always. It's not in your central line of vision but it's always there, blurry in the corner of your peripheral view. From time to time, it'll remind you that it's there, sort of like a sore muscle or that bruise you'd almost forgotten... until you touch it.  So I guess the memories associated with deployment and the year we spent apart will raise their little noggins from time to time; it's to be expected I suppose. I just hope that when they lift their little eyes to mine, I'll smile and be reminded to appreciate what I have and to not take any moment for granted. After all, it's soldiers like Robert who are protecting our liberties and our freedoms, those things we so often take for granted, that gave me those memories in the first place. Even though they aren't always pleasant little jaunts down memory lane, to honor him, I will honor them.

I know that the new memories created over the coming days will far outweigh the old memories of the past year. Case in point- we had a FANTASTIC weekend and I'll tell you all about it tomorrow...

In the meantime, I hope your weekend was worthy of a scrapbook page and that your week will be something special, something fantastic, something MORE.

Remember me?

After much consideration and some gentle nudging from Robert, I've decided it's time to blow the dust off this blog and get back to doing what I love with people I love and sharing it all with you.

Where have I been the past 9 months? If you followed the blog the last time around, you know that Robert left in September 2011 for a year long deployment to somewhere most folks can't pronounce. Having been married only a short six weeks, it goes without saying that a marriage built on love but held together by skype and email is a special sort of challenge but one that we accepted and, I think, mastered. To be honest, being apart sorta took the creative wind out of my blogging sails (Either that or all of my creative energies were directed to care packages and daily snail mail) so at the end of the year, I let the blog lapse. It just wasn't fun to do things without Robert and when I did do something fun, I felt guilty that he was stuck somewhere having anything but fun so I didn't really want to publish my good times to the world or to my 16 blog followers, as the case may be.

But September 9, 2012, all of that changed. It's funny what happens when a plane lands on the flight line and you finally see your husband after 352 days of being apart. In the same moment that you're beyond thrilled to hold him, you realize that you've been holding your breath for a solid year. You allow yourself that first breath and all of the fear and worry you couldn't acknowledge while he was away bubbles up from the place where it's been pushed down all year. In the same instant that you're overwhelmed with gratitude that he's home safe, you wonder if you have the stamina to do another year of this should he have to go somewhere else. At the same time that you're feeling all of this heavy stuff, you feel like a huge weight has been lifted. It's a confusing mix of thrilled and terrified; elated and exhausted; anticipation and anxiety but at the same time, it's amazing to know that he's home where he belongs and that things are going to be just fine.

And in a day or two, when all of that emotion settles back down and life begins to return to "normal", you realize that things are more than just fine; they're fantastic! The past is in the past, today is a gift, and tomorrow holds the promise of something wonderful. There are lots of adventures on our calendar to be shared and I hope that you'll hop on, buckle up, and enjoy the ride on our crazy roller coaster life.

Thanks for stopping by the blog. I hope to see you again soon! In the meantime, as always, make today something special, something memorable, something MORE.