Weekend Review

I’m taking a little break from the Sunday standard post- the Monday Music Review- because my weekend was too much fun to wait until tomorrow to tell you about.

I went back to my hometown to work the Toughman competition on Friday and Saturday nights. If you’ve never been to a Toughman, there really are no words to do it justice. People come in from off the street, training is not required and the skill levels range from “I hit the bag in the gym every day” to “I’ve watched some fights on TV” and cover everything in between. Friday night, there were 32 fighters, in four weight classes. The winners came back on Saturday to continue the eliminations and to fight in “championship” fights for cash. I’m still not sure what possesses anyone to want to participate in a Toughman but the guys in the competition seemed to really be enjoying themselves and they were as nice and friendly as they could be. I may or may not have made some friends… that’s another story for another day.

And guess who else really enjoyed himself? My dad! Now before you go and get all excited, no, he wasn’t IN the fights. He came to the fights with the Rescue Squad as medical support. And since he’s been on the Rescue Squad for as long as I can remember, I knew almost everyone who was with him. It felt like old times, when I used to run into “chaperones” everywhere I went. Apparently, there’s a brotherhood in the Rescue Squad (and Fire Department too) that the guys look after each others’ kids so growing up, I knew no matter where I went, there was someone there if I needed anything (and someone there to report any of my misbehaviors back to dad!) I’m sure dad doesn’t know how many times his roles on the Rescue Squad and Fire Department kept me out of trouble… or maybe he does. Regardless, I wouldn’t change my continually chaperoned upbringing for anything in the world.

After the fight, Dad made some world famous grilled cheese sandwiches (yeah, we let Mom have one too!) and it felt like the good old days when he’d make late night cheese sandwiches and we’d stay up talking. I wonder if parents and kids talk these days like we did back then. If they don’t, they surely should.

And, we went to the firing range and wreaked some havoc on some paper targets. And, in true dad fashion, he took the targets to the fight to show my mad skill set to his buddies. I’m thinking he’s just a smidgen proud of his baby girl. J

And, no worries, Mom wasn’t left out of this fun family weekend! She and I did a little shopping and the saleslady thought we were sisters. I think that made Mom’s day! And, when the fifth person told me, “You look just like your mom”, I decided that perhaps I don’t need a crystal ball to tell me what I’ll look like in the future.

So, today I left the hometown and headed back to the big city and there may or may not have been tears. Maybe it was all the quality time with Mom and Dad that did it (but don’t tell them that, they like to think I’m doing just fine in the big city.) We’ll just say that there’s something about a 32 man brawl that makes me miss home. J

Clean Plate Club

When you’re little, everyone encourages you to be a member of the Clean Plate Club. Eat all your veggies, try it and you might like it, and so on. And, as we know, ‘membership has it’s privileges’ so if you’re successfully initiated into the Club, you get a fantastic reward, which is usually a fun, yummy dessert or an extra few minutes of television time before bed.

Fast forward twenty-five years or so… for me, the Plate Club is now something entirely different.

I’m a busy gal. I don’t think anyone would argue with me on that. My boss has been heard more than once remarking, “You have more than you can say grace over.” I often wonder if there’s a desk under all the papers piled up in my office. I question how I’ll finish all the projects and tasks that are on my work to-do list. Outside of the office, I’m trying all sorts of new things, and I’m having a great time but a lengthy night’s sleep has become the exception rather than the rule. I am, without a doubt, a card-carrying, office-holding, founding-member of the FULL Plate Club. And most days, I believe my full plate needs a salad plate, and a dessert plate, and a soup bowl to hold all of my activities and commitments. But, to be quite candid, I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I think I’d lose my mind if I actually had a clean plate again.

As I venture outside my box, I discover new things yet I’m not willing to give up any of the old things I love so my tastes just become more varied and diverse as time goes on. As I’ve said before, maybe I’m finding myself or maybe I’ve already found myself in a million tiny places. But now that I have so much going on, inevitably things overlap and I struggle to decide what to do and what to skip. If anyone can tell me how to be in two places at once, I’m all ears!

On the drive home tonight, while I was thinking through my plan for the evening and the weekend, I thought about how many things are on my calendar in the upcoming months. It’s a little overwhelming but it’s also very exciting. Today, I added three more fantastically exciting adventures to the list. I won’t spoil the surprises but buckle up tight, blogbuddies, you’re in for quite a few surprises! (There is absolutely no doubt that 2011 is going to be Something More!)

Leopards and Lightening Sand

When I started this blog, I vowed to make it a happy little place and for the most part, I’ve stood by that commitment. I did say that sooner or later, this little-engine-that-could would inevitably jump the tracks and get stuck in the mud or lost in the tall weeds. I promised myself that I would not stay stuck long (my mom says pity parties have a shelf life of about 24 hours before they get annoying to those around us) and that I would try to find something useful in the midst of the muck.

Lately, I’ve heard a lot of people saying they were disappointed in this or that. Truth be told, I might actually be one of those people. My weekend went as far off the rails as I could imagine and I had more than a few opportunities for disappointment. By Monday morning, to be honest, I was stuck in a quagmire of disappointment and couldn’t quite figure out how to get out. I felt like Princess Buttercup in The Princess Bride when she fell into the lightening sand in the fire swamp and disappeared. I needed a Westley to grab a vine, dive in, and rescue me. Sadly, there was no Westley in sight so I was on my own to save myself.

Monday night, I did what I do when I’m stressed or my feelings are hurt. I donned my boxing gloves and pounded out what felt like 100 rounds on the punching bag in my garage. I got temporarily lost in the rhythm of the jab, cross, hook, uppercut but when my arms turned to jell-o and the gloves suddenly seemed to have gained about twenty pounds, I quit, feeling no closer to my normal state of bliss than when I’d started.

I then ruined all that frenzied exercise by spending some time with a spoon and a bucket of butter pecan. That didn’t do much except give me a belly ache. If Ben & Jerry can’t fix it, it’s time to officially declare it a crisis and take drastic measures.

I pulled out my go-to guide for emotional balance, a handy dandy book I picked up years ago but that now has more highlights and ink marks than original type. Iyanla Vanzant’s One Day My Soul Opened Up. In the matter of disappointment, Iyanla says this:

           

“The only thing people can do is what they can do. They may say they can do something else. They may want to do something else. We go along, believing what they say even when their track record tells us otherwise. In the end, we say they disappointed us. No. We are disappointed that we put our faith in this person despite our better judgment. People will always show you who they are.”

Oh, thank you, Iyanla, how right you are! I’ve heard Oprah say that too, “People will always show you who they are. You should listen the first time.” Smart ladies, Iyanla and Oprah! I believe, like me, they’ve doled out a few too many second chances in their days to have learned this lesson and to be able to speak to it with such authority.

As I looked back over the downfalls of my weekend, I realized that 1. The object of my disappointment had done exactly what their nature dictated and 2. I was really more annoyed with myself for choosing to believe what I knew all along was not true, accurate, or even possible.

It’s sort of like the saying, “A leopard can’t change his spots.” You can’t fault a leopard for doing what leopards do; they don’t mean anything by it, they’re just doing what they were created to do. You also can’t blame a leopard for not being born a zebra; it wasn’t meant to be anything but a leopard and it’s not anyone's fault.

According to Iyanla, the cure for disappointment is to forgive yourself for choosing not to clearly see the information that was right in front of you. Given that I like me (I’ve said more than once ‘If I weren’t me, I’d be friends with me.’), forgiving myself is well within my range and something I'm more than willing to do. I picked myself up, brushed myself off, apologized to Ben & Jerry for scarfing and not savoring their morsels of frozen delight, and made a new commitment to myself to keep my arms, legs, and especially my heart inside the train at all times, especially when the tracks wander into those tall weed territories where the leopards (and other “wild animals”) like to hide. And, if anyone sees a Westley, send him my way; there's bound to be more lightening sand around here somewhere...

Any Given Sunday

Yesterday marked the beginning of one of my favorite seasons of the year- NASCAR season! And wow, did we start it off RIGHT with the Daytona 500. If you missed it, there were tears and cheers, then a bit of yelling at the television, some more cheers, and it ended with tears through cheers when it all came together for a green-white-checkered finish that left me saying, “that’s why I love NASCAR… because anything can happen on any given Sunday.”

Let’s recap for those of you who spent your sunny Sunday out in the clear blue yonder or under a rock somewhere.

With 31 degree banking, a resurfaced track, and the penchant to race three-wide, we knew the Great American Race would not disappoint. And it certainly did not. With 74 lead changes between 22 drivers and 16 cautions sprinkled throughout the 200 (errr, 206, I think) laps, records were set left and right (or maybe left and left since racing is a bunch of left turns). 

The highlights began as early as lap 3 with the tribute to the legendary Dale Earnhardt, Sr. The fans gave a tremendous standing ovation and held up three fingers while soaking in the beautiful and unmistakable sound of NASCAR’s horses. On the tenth anniversary of NASCAR and America losing The Intimidator, it was a fitting memorial. And rumor has it that in the celebration of Dale’s life and legacy earlier in the week, fans were given stick-on moustaches. I think Dale would have liked that. J

By lap 22, Kevin Harvick was out of the race and I was forced to cheer for one of my other favorites. And no sooner than my guy was finished with his garage interview about the cracked engine block that ruined his day, “The Big One”, the crash that takes out what seems like half the field, took 17 cars out of contention in the Great American Race.

On lap 79, Little E, Dale Earnhardt, Jr., took the lead and I’m pretty sure the fans at the speedway could be heard somewhere on the other side of South Dakota. I’m told it was deafening. I don’t doubt it.

There was lead changing and bump drafting and more partner-swapping than a junior high dance and before we knew it, we were on lap 196 when Regan Smith and Kurt Busch got tangled up and sent us into a caution with four tiny little laps to go. Four tiny laps that probably felt like 400 miles to the ten or so guys who had a chance to take the checkered flag.

On the restart, David Ragan and Trevor Bayne had a plan but that plan blew up when Ragan was black flagged for changing lanes before crossing the Start-Finish line. An elementary mistake, true, but that’s what happens when the Daytona pressure gets to you. This is a purse of more than 1.4 million dollars. People tend to get in a hurry when racing for bucks that big. So, Trevor Bayne was left in the front, with no partner, and with Big Boys the likes of Tony Stewart, Kurt Busch, Carl Edwards, and Bobby Labonte, nipping at his heels. Would the 20 year old rookie in just his second Sprint Cup start cave to the pressure?

Not a chance. Bobby Labonte gave the newcomer some drafting help and Bayne was able to block a hard-charging Carl Edwards to take the win.

I’m pretty sure there will NEVER be another birthday gift in the history of Trevor Bayne’s life to rival the Daytona 500 trophy he got this year. He was an unlikely bet yesterday; he was, after all, only contracted to drive a few races this season. He was working with NASCAR’s oldest team but a team that hadn’t won the Daytona 500 since 1976 (folks, I wasn’t even born then so you know that’s a long time to go on a winless streak) and hadn’t won a Sprint Cup race since 2001. The odds were against him, no doubt, but that’s why we love NASCAR. Because you never know what will happen; you never know when “The Big One” will take out your favorite driver or the driver you love to hate; and that’s why I’ve already got my schedule blocked for next Sunday’s race in Phoenix. And, by the standard set yesterday, Phoenix better bring it because the boys surely will. They’ll be non-stop, full throttle, pedal to the metal, race it till it blows up; and watching it won’t just be fun, it’ll be NASCARFUN.

Monday Music Review- Nathan Lienard

Monday Music Review on Sunday? Yes, because Monday comes quickly and I want you to be prepared in the morning when you roll out of bed in need of coffee and a good tune to get you moving. So, for this blog, the Monday Music Review comes a day early because it’s my party. And that’s the way I want it.

I don’t know about you, but I enjoy the fact that most of the MMR artists thus far have been artists you didn’t know but now wonder how you ever lived without. Today we have another of those artists who makes me want to call my local radio station and say “How is it that you don’t know this phenomenal artist?” Welcome to my playlist, Nathan Lienard.

I was perusing the internet on Friday and saw that a great friend from college, Melissa, had posted a facebook status about Nathan’s new single. They are friends and any friend of Melissa’s is a friend of mine so I checked it out and knew immediately, if not sooner, that Nathan Lienard had to be this week’s MMR.

Toward the end of his college career, Nathan traded his baseball bat for a guitar and has been playing, singing, and songwriting ever since. And my biggest complaint about that is that I didn’t know it before now. Nathan describes himself as having a “chilled out coffeehouse style”. I would agree; Nathan’s sound is rich and mellow, his lyrics clear and beautifully simple. He truly has a way with words and if you ever need a romantic line, Nathan should be your go-to guy. He has a sound that would easily carry you through a day at the office, and songs that have a similar vibe but aren’t cookie cutter so you could replay his 2009 CD The Road is Long over and over without getting bored.

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a zillion times, I love lyrics. I learn them, write them down, repeat them. I want them to matter to me, to be words I might use, to be lines that make me think, “that’s just what I meant to say but didn’t know how to say it.” Nathan Lienard must be in my head somewhere because he understands this to a degree not found in many of today’s artists. I love the sentiment of “I can’t see two days from now, tomorrow’s in the way” in the song Dear Friend. It’s a gentle reminder to focus on the present and to cherish each moment. “No time for details, got the big picture on my mind. No need for who, what, when, how, or why” in The Road is Long reminds me not to sweat the small stuff. For this type-A personality who often gets sidetracked by the details, this is a reminder I need often.

Nathan Lienard has a newly released song, Time Machine, which seems to be a bit of a detour from his previous album. This song is a bit more peppy, a little flirty, and just downright fun. It tells me that Nathan Lienard is using his second musical project to stretch and to grow, to see where his always-reaching musical wings will take him. I believe (and there are lots of Williamsburg, Virginia fans who will agree with me) that Nathan Lienard is taking flight in the contemporary easy listening musical world and that his journey will be that of a rising star.

A kind word of advice for you, friends: before you listen to his songs, make some room on your iPod because after you hear Nathan Lienard, there will be no doubt that you’ll want to download the album. Happy listening, friends!

What's a Girl to Do?

As most of you know, I’m a single gal trying to navigate the super scary realm known as “dating after 30”. It’s an absolute nightmare, this mission of trying to find the right guy with the right priorities and the right agenda. Most days, I choose to laugh because the alternative would completely ruin my make-up but I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m frustrated that there seems to be no end in sight to this quest that I’ve been on for what seems like 82 eternities. Tonight, I’m a bit down in the dumps about the whole crazy mixed-up thing and since the words are bouncing around in my head, I’m going to take a minute to vent. (It’s my blog; I can do that!)

I tried a popular internet site, you know the one with the “free communication weekend” and I must have done something wrong when I filled out my profile because the people I met didn’t match me on one level, much less the 27 levels of compatibility touted on the commercials. I was starting to think I didn’t know myself as well as I thought. It crossed my mind to have someone else fill out my profile because it occurs to me that sometimes other people see you differently than you see yourself.

I then tried a free internet site but it’s true that sometimes, you get what you pay for. Not to mention the completely embarrassing story of how I inadvertently made my screen name a little too similar to a lunatic trash website (that apparently everyone knew about but me; I guess I really was raised in a bubble) and couldn’t figure out why I was getting all grades of requests and comments from people who were all too willing to let their freak flags fly. I have since remedied this dreadful but enlightening situation and am now getting matches from seemingly ‘normal’ men. And my self-esteem has almost recovered. Almost. Maybe.

I’ve had some fantastic friends set me up with great people but, for whatever reason, those things just haven’t worked out to become anything more than buddies. I’m OK with that and I love my friends for trying.

And then there have been a few nights dating at the speed of blur with a popular speed dating company in the area. Most people think speed dating is strange; I thought it was fun. And for the amount of time invested, I met some people who kept me entertained for several months. And, truth be told, I still keep up with a few guys I met in the blurry haze of names and faces. I also met some characters who will likely take center stage if I ever write a book about the trials and tribulations of dating.

So here I am, still searching for the guy to be the last chapter of my dating book, the one guy who brings me to my Happily Ever After.

A few nights ago, a great friend said, “Have you tried…” and she mentioned a company who sets professionals up on lunch dates. You submit a profile and show up for lunch; they do all the rest. Sounded pretty good. What did I have to lose?

Well, let me just tell you what I had to lose. Six hundred dollars for a membership AND one hundred dollars per month. I’m not sure what your financial situation is but to me, that’s a lot of cash, especially when the dating director (now that would be a fun job, or at least a fun job title) couldn’t tell me how many dates would be guaranteed per month. Their system sounded like a great program but I just couldn’t bring myself to even try to find a way to fund this love-seeking endeavor. In my humble little opinion, being single over thirty with jobs and bills and responsibilities is difficult enough without adding the extra pressure of trying to justify a 100 dollar lunch. (Oh, and by the way, the 100 dollars doesn't even cover your lunch; you pay for that separately.)

And so the quest continues, and I’ll keep you posted. Now that I’ve pretty much given up on the internet, speed dating, and set-ups from family and friends, I guess I’ll just have to do this the old fashioned way… I’m planning to run my cart into the next cute boy I see at Wal-Mart. J

Super Wednesday

Every now and then a Wednesday isn’t just a Wednesday; it’s a super Wednesday! And just what makes it a super Wednesday? Super Doubles at Harris Teeter! I normally don’t “do” math but in the case of a coupon, I’ll make an exception every time.

My couponing motto is: “The more I save on necessities, the more I can spend on accessories.” And today, in just a few minutes, I saved enough money for at least one pair of shoes or that super cute ring I’ve had my eye on in the Premiere catalog.

I spent 10 minutes during my lunch hour comparing the HT sales flier to the coupons in my organizer. I spent 15 minutes after work shopping.

In today’s shopping spree, I bought:

3 bags of yellow rice

1 box of brown rice

3 boxes granola bars

2 boxes of scalloped potatoes

1 bag of banana chips

1 pack of cheese slices

1 pie

1 roll of mints

5 tubes of toothpaste

Bill on this purchase: 45.42

Saved with sales and coupons: 32.31

I paid: 13.11

That, my friends, is a 72% savings! And if you figure I ‘made’ 32 dollars in less than half an hour of work, you could rationalize that I made 64 dollars an hour. If I actually made 64 dollars an hour, my salary would be somewhere around 133,000 per year. Now that’s a shoe salary that could allow me to kick up my Minolo Blahniks!

To answer the questions I get most often: Yes, people laugh at my three-ring binder with the baseball card inserts coupon organizer (that is, until they are in line behind me at the register and see what I pay). No, I don't buy something just because it's economical or free UNLESS I have a friend or family member who will use those items (and no, I would never charge those friends and family, like some people I know. That, to me, is just greedy). No, couponing isn't difficult once you find an organization system that works for you. Yes, now that I know what I can do with a coupon, it irks me when I have to pay full price. and Yes, couponing is absolutely worth the few minutes a week I put into the clipping and organizing effort.

I strongly encourage you to consider couponing as a way to stretch your dollars, to help you ensure that you don't have more month than money, and to allow you to have some WAM (walkin' around money). I may look like a nerd on a mission when I go into Harris Teeter armed with my organizer, list, and calculator but I know that buying shoes is much more fun than buying toothpaste and if saving on one gets me the other, it's worth all the quizzical looks in the world thrown at me by those full-price-paying shoppers who just don't get it. yet.